Mossy

“Mossy” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

SWB Bad Poetry at it’s best:

Mossy,
in the morning a little bit glossy.

Slick,
it ain’t gonna help you light a candle wick.

Slippy,
nothing giving that super tight grip.

Green,
well … it’s usually green.

It’s a slick mossy rock,
you expected more?

-SWB

We decided to compliment your “case of the Mondays” with our “case of bad poetry” ….. enjoy. You gotta admin – the pic is cool, though.

Saving The World

“Saved” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

Saving the world,
part of my job.

Not saying much,
times ignored.

The power I hold,
renews a chance.

Families to be given,
a second time to plan.

Persons entrusted,
a second gift to give.

A new time to live,
just part of my job.

-SWB

Screaming Weasel

Yep … that’s us!

A bit about “us” – since many have only been introduced to us recently, and nobody ever reads the “about” tab – and honestly, some time we just put things in it to be goofballs.

Most of the time it’s me, the author, Lawrence Capozzolo (signed SWB). An American, or Italian/German American, or mutt, or one of the people that’s paying a mortgage to house my step-daughter’s four furry critters (two dogs, a cat, and a rat). We’re pretty sure the animals had their lawyer get their names on the deed for the house too. They may have taken ours off at this point.

SWB started originally started in 2006 when I purchased my G4 iBook and it had iWeb on it. I made my first posting after I noticed a blog called That’s Church (I’m pretty sure that was still its title back then – but I’m getting old, and memories fade fast now … so I could be incorrect.) The person writing “That’s Church” eventually went on to write for Pittsburgh Magazine.  Although my blog become popular in about fifteen countries doing about 1.2 million hits a year, I chose getting back into I.T. work (I could have been smarter and went back to school for carpentry or plumbing or HVAC …. but NO, I stuck with I.T.) therefore still writing but not keeping it up eventually doing it professionally.

The blog was started, like others at the time as a rant blog (humorous rant). I figured people would find humor in the annoying blabberings of us tech types, and I was right. Now that I’m close to 50 (ok …. REALLY close) I’m getting back into writing for it and doing photography for it again (unless otherwise stated – those photos are really mine) basically because of ageism (tech is becoming like the NFL … if you didn’t get your first Ferrari right in the beginning, the youngin’s aren’t going to give you a chance to get one now … you’re too old to work in tech) I’m back to writing. I like doing it anyway.

I don’t know if I’ll get my numbers back up or if I’ll ever get a donation (but although I’m not a non-profit, please keep in mind I have to replace two cars, a furnace, and put a kid through university – so have a heart, consider donating).  Right now I do a little sound engineering work, etc – waiting to get back into tech if I ever do.  If I just end up writing, better yet.

Back to SWB. It will continue to be a showcase for humorous rant, really bad poetry, attempts at legitimate poetry, and whatever gets thrown into it. Some others may write for it (if they do you will know). If you like the writing, please like the posts or blog – if you really like it – follow, if you think I should put it into a book – donate. Remember, books still do things like enabling me to generate enough money to donate to others that love to do what writers love to do.

The photography is also part of the showcasing in SWB, I’ve been doing this since the age of 13 …. so 36 years. You’ll notice various formats (slide, digital, modified, etc). The other site I write for Pittsburgh By Mini Cam is designed to be for low-res photography.

Yes … we do on purpose write badly, strangely, and horrendously (this is different from “badly” as it indicates a “graduate” level of “bad”). We try to make you think by readings that make you feel that Scotty forgot to but a few brain atoms back into you after beaming you up.

We just have fun.

… and we do consider padded rooms to be ultra comfy posh places. The straight jackets are slightly annoying though – especially when you have to type with your teeth.

We are the late show, art gallery, literary short, stand up comedian, sitcom, political humorist, poetm, life loving, opinionated schmucked (buggered for the British folks) up oxygen breathing carbon based units that you will hopefully learn to as least like. If not, click the “like” button anyway – people lie all the time.

-Lawrence A Capozzolo

SWB – “making legimate writer groan in agony”

Scientifically Proven Fact

Strange … it’s strange.We are all real.

SWB Series: Thoughts For The Strange

We are real.

It’s been proven.

There are those that contest this and insist we are all figments of each other’s imaginations brought together by a rare form of quantum entanglement.

These are the “unrealists”.

The unrealists tend to pair the flat earth folks and they may be proving slightly similar points. Only one difficulty is found in this situation, and that is the mutual felling that each is unreal and just a figment of something (imagination or otherwise).

To those that are real, reality TV is a great outlet for life and an established place for daily humor, while for unrealists is a series of documentaries of what doesn’t exist (although, there are times where the real and unrealists have agreed on that point during a show – see, reality shows are sometimes so planned that they are truly unreal and fictional, which proves points on both sides of the  real and unreal arguments … ie. the fiction is real, but the situation is unreal and all are figments of otherwise).

Insane, right?

Not to the unrealists and those trying to disprove their points (themselves at times since unrealists are really figments of themselves … they think).

Now, all of these points are scientifically proven by some type of science somewhere … you just have to find it – or make it up until it exists.  Making it up isn’t wrong – at some point everything exists. Star Trek proved that.

Did you get that transparent aluminum serving bowl yet?

One of the best points in scientific practice is to try to disprove your point or theory. This puts the unrealists in a situation where they have to try to prove everything to be “real” placing them on the side of “the real” during this process. Politically this is an issue, because it causes internal strife with many “unrealist” organizations. Many a mini civil war within the unrealists have erupted during this disapproval process – even in purely scientific situations.

Scientists on both sides are trying to resolve this argument within 100 years … although this will be a challenge since both sides are still struggling with shapes and sizes, including that of the earth.

Unreal reality may result as a compromise to the argument.

This could ultimately result in things like the economy not being real and bread becoming free – since it wouldn’t be real in the world of the unrealists.

Note: To clarify “anti-reality” is not part of this discussion as it is a separate theory practiced under a completely different scientific discipline of the twisted grass method. This method would take close to a month to summarize, so we’ll hold off on that for now.

Please remember while reading this that this is completely unreal to the unrealists and the real alike simply because it is only a few atoms meshing into some form of digital ink (and if you try to make it completely real by printing it will damage your printer … since your printer is unreal, it can’t print anything real).

All hail reality!!!

… except for the unrealists.

-SWB … scientifically proven fact at it’s best.

We believe in inciting brain damage with words to help in keeping you from becoming a drug addict or alcoholic to obtain the same result.

The Continuing Saga Of The Tad-Frog

Current shot of our Tad-Frog with his new legs. I woke up this morning to find out my Tad-Frog finally has front legs. i’m happy for him, but a little disappointed personally, as it was fun owning a freak of nature, and we were kind of hoping he’s obtain us some extra income from the industrial park across the street.

We’re not sure what spawned the change. It could have been nature, and the fact that it is spring (although he’s in a 55 gallon tank and probably doesn’t know the difference). It also could have also been his deep desire to get away from the Killer Goldfish in the tank with him. Maybe he was just a little slower than the other tadpoles. We’ll never really know. We just home the other frogs will accept him.

-SWB

PS – It would be cool if he kept the tail … it’s pretty big now, along with the fact that would mess with some of the Darwin theories.

Highlighting a Pittsburgh Columnist: Mike Seate

Normally SWB reserves a “Cool Stuff” posting for neat new tech toys and such, but occasionally something else or someone deemed worthy of the title pops up.

Currently that is a columnist from the Tribune-Review that I have been reading articles by – Mike Seate. He doesn’t appear to have a set theme (ie. “My Life in the City”, etc), but does excellent articles on a bunch of things, issues, life lessons, etc that pop up in every day life. The articles are well written, funny – depending on the subject, and informative enough to keep a literary picky person interested.

Click Here to check his archive out, and keep reading hist columns along with us.

-SWB

PS – We plug who we believe is worth reading.

The Air Car

Air Car photo from MDI website

Sometimes we like to highlight things that are just cool. One of the current ones is the Air Car from MDI that goes 140 miles on one fill-up of compressed air.

Now, this isn’t a Pittsburgh thing in anyway – but I think it’s cool for following reasons:

• It made it to a trade show floor will thousands, if not tens of thousands will see it before someone from the oil companies could “off” the creator of it.
• I know it just has to be ****ing off the the oil companies.
• It’s just cool.

-SWB

PS …. finally a way to make use of the hot air from your boss 🙂