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Posts Tagged ‘humor’

Mossy

May 21, 2018 Leave a comment
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“Mossy” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

SWB Bad Poetry at it’s best:

Mossy,
in the morning a little bit glossy.

Slick,
it ain’t gonna help you light a candle wick.

Slippy,
nothing giving that super tight grip.

Green,
well … it’s usually green.

It’s a slick mossy rock,
you expected more?

-SWB

We decided to compliment your “case of the Mondays” with our “case of bad poetry” ….. enjoy. You gotta admin – the pic is cool, though.

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Exhausted

May 17, 2018 Leave a comment
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“Exhausted” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

Exhausted this time,
tired of waiting in line.

Extended beyond needs,
no life left to do deeds,

Exhausted this time,
the only thing left – a stupid rhyme.

Typing out the words,
that everyone has already heard.

Exhausted in time,
why lie?

-SWB

…… back to our really bad poetry series 🙂

Escape

May 12, 2018 Leave a comment
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“Rusted Escape” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

Escape when I can,
to another land.

Running away in a dream,
allowing me to be.

A life botched,
i’m trying to live not.

Corrections to be made,
directions lacking the way.

Eluding some say,
responsibilities of the day.

Wanting nothing new,
avoiding and delaying change.

Escape meaning much,
when life seems out to lunch.

-SWB

Not What I Expected

May 10, 2018 Leave a comment
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“Not What I Want” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

A gloomy day with no sun,
not what I expected for first sight.

Upon opening my eyes and what I felt in my head,
i think I woke up in a trench to a morning I would dread.

Breakfast will be the perk I need,
opening the door, greeted by milk looking to burst.

I’ll grab something, I think,
going for my jacket, my keys on the floor I see.

Looking up I see hanging there,
jacket torn — it’s a great ‘morn.

Now a windy day … appropriate to push me along,
opening the door, now airborne, soon I see it no more.

This day not what I expected,
praying for better I feel neglected.

Not asking for much,
surely someone thinks I expect more than I deserve.

I walk to my car – foot landing in something like tar,
the same color as my shoes I figure no one will notice.

This morning not what I want,
causing my ambition to turn to fluff.

A happy day,
not what I expected.

-SWB

… a “case of the Mondays” poem.

Night Light

May 9, 2018 Leave a comment
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Bad Animal Poetry Division

Night light, night bright,
the gopher’s going to eat my garden tonight.

Standing in the night light,
I see beady eyes bright.

A giggle I hear,
from under my house, through a little square.

Grinding of teeth,
prepping for a bite.

My award winning garden,
is going away tonight.

-SWB

… remember, we warned you it was bad poetry.

Screaming Weasel

May 9, 2018 Leave a comment
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Yep … that’s us!

A bit about “us” – since many have only been introduced to us recently, and nobody ever reads the “about” tab – and honestly, some time we just put things in it to be goofballs.

Most of the time it’s me, the author, Lawrence Capozzolo (signed SWB). An American, or Italian/German American, or mutt, or one of the people that’s paying a mortgage to house my step-daughter’s four furry critters (two dogs, a cat, and a rat). We’re pretty sure the animals had their lawyer get their names on the deed for the house too. They may have taken ours off at this point.

SWB started originally started in 2006 when I purchased my G4 iBook and it had iWeb on it. I made my first posting after I noticed a blog called That’s Church (I’m pretty sure that was still its title back then – but I’m getting old, and memories fade fast now … so I could be incorrect.) The person writing “That’s Church” eventually went on to write for Pittsburgh Magazine.  Although my blog become popular in about fifteen countries doing about 1.2 million hits a year, I chose getting back into I.T. work (I could have been smarter and went back to school for carpentry or plumbing or HVAC …. but NO, I stuck with I.T.) therefore still writing but not keeping it up eventually doing it professionally.

The blog was started, like others at the time as a rant blog (humorous rant). I figured people would find humor in the annoying blabberings of us tech types, and I was right. Now that I’m close to 50 (ok …. REALLY close) I’m getting back into writing for it and doing photography for it again (unless otherwise stated – those photos are really mine) basically because of ageism (tech is becoming like the NFL … if you didn’t get your first Ferrari right in the beginning, the youngin’s aren’t going to give you a chance to get one now … you’re too old to work in tech) I’m back to writing. I like doing it anyway.

I don’t know if I’ll get my numbers back up or if I’ll ever get a donation (but although I’m not a non-profit, please keep in mind I have to replace two cars, a furnace, and put a kid through university – so have a heart, consider donating).  Right now I do a little sound engineering work, etc – waiting to get back into tech if I ever do.  If I just end up writing, better yet.

Back to SWB. It will continue to be a showcase for humorous rant, really bad poetry, attempts at legitimate poetry, and whatever gets thrown into it. Some others may write for it (if they do you will know). If you like the writing, please like the posts or blog – if you really like it – follow, if you think I should put it into a book – donate. Remember, books still do things like enabling me to generate enough money to donate to others that love to do what writers love to do.

The photography is also part of the showcasing in SWB, I’ve been doing this since the age of 13 …. so 36 years. You’ll notice various formats (slide, digital, modified, etc). The other site I write for Pittsburgh By Mini Cam is designed to be for low-res photography.

Yes … we do on purpose write badly, strangely, and horrendously (this is different from “badly” as it indicates a “graduate” level of “bad”). We try to make you think by readings that make you feel that Scotty forgot to but a few brain atoms back into you after beaming you up.

We just have fun.

… and we do consider padded rooms to be ultra comfy posh places. The straight jackets are slightly annoying though – especially when you have to type with your teeth.

We are the late show, art gallery, literary short, stand up comedian, sitcom, political humorist, poetm, life loving, opinionated schmucked (buggered for the British folks) up oxygen breathing carbon based units that you will hopefully learn to as least like. If not, click the “like” button anyway – people lie all the time.

-Lawrence A Capozzolo

SWB – “making legimate writer groan in agony”

Let’s Talk Nature

May 8, 2018 Leave a comment
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“Lying Around” (c)Lawrence A Capozzolo

Let’s talk nature,
just lying around.

Let’s talk nature,
just sitting on the ground.

Let’s talk nature,
making all those weird sounds.

Let’s talk nature,
popping up all those flowers.

Let’s talk nature,

listening in on our secrets.

Let’s talk nature,
a windy thing is she.

Let’s talk nature,
her beats makin’ me dream.

Let’s talk nature,
the next top 40 record breaker.

-SWB

….. back to our bad poetry series (we haven’t done one in a while … then again, opinions vary about that).