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Happiness On Monday

face1mondayIf this popped up in your reader you are probably saying something like “What the … ? Are you serious about a post on Happiness on Monday???? Look to the left, this is my face on Monday … are you serious?? arrrgghhh!!!!”

So, now that we have everyone’s anger out in the open – I have found the key to happiness on Monday. Here it is: Find some genetic artist, have them turn you into a dog (they can do that now … genetic artists are looking to practice their free speech also – their new creative art form has been repressed for too long). After that …. eat, sleep, pee, poop. That’s it …. do nothing else. If you are a dog … you have no idea it’s Monday If it’s Monday your owners will probably be too lazy to clean off their plates from Sunday night … thus, free treats Monday morning (just ignore the white furry stuff that formed overnight on the corners of the food).

Anyway … here are the top five ways to find happiness on Monday:

  • Become a dog … why not? There are perks, think about it.
  • Grow more hair … oops, sorry – I thought you noticed that bald spot behind your head.
  • Spike your coffee … keep in mind at least one of your co-workers is probably lit already today, why not you too?
  • Eat more shrimp … there is something to be said about gluttony (and shrimp).
  • Annoy someone … if someone else is the one irritated and unhappy, your mind is amused and off your own issues.

My personal opinion on Monday? Well, I don’t think I can use that type of speech on WordPress …


PS – SWB does not condone drinking at work in any way, unless SWB works there and you are sharing.

  1. March 30, 2009 at 12:17 pm

    I always wanted to grow up to be a lion

    • SWB
      March 30, 2009 at 2:08 pm

      Interesting – I guess that could work too (sleep, pee, poop, eat a variety of small animals).

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